The citations below are all true and come from our family’s collection of Italianisms/Canadianisms and plain goofy but effective communication.
They are retold with affection and admired for their comedic value even all these years later.
Location: Toronto, Canada between 1953 and 2009
Encyclopedia Salesman: Good morning Madam, may I introduce you to the world of encyclopedia Brittanica. It is guaranteed to change your life.
My aunt: No thank you. I’m not interesting.
Cousin 1: Don’t go near nonna today. She is really really upset!
Cousin 2: Why, what happened?
Cousin 1: I’m not sure. But I’ve never seen her so mad. She’s fumigating!
Mother: Where’s Franca?
Neighbour: In the yarda.
Mother: She better not be climbing the fensa again! Tell her to come and take out the garbeech.
Aunt: Where are the crekkers I just bought?
Uncle: In the cobaird, where you always put them.
Friend 1: I saw Rosa yesterday after her shift at work. She was showing everyone in the factory parking lot her new bag
Friend 2: Designer?
Friend 1: Yeah! I wanna know where she got the money to buy a Louie Vachon with her salary!
Title photo by Pixaby